"Alright, I didn't know what you wanted for dinner, so I got you a packet of friend rice and some stir-fried kai lan with oyster sauce. The one just down the street?," studying me carefully. "Yeah, sure sure. Thanks, Jo." After being submerged in the water for God knows how long, the strain was starting to show in my face. The air was bad from cigarette smoke, my cigarette smoke.
I pulled out the chair in front of me, sat down and took a good hard look at her. "Do I come across to you as someone who would drown herself in the tub?" I took a cigarette, lit it and inhaled deeply. "This is a billion times better then sex." "You should really try smoking, Jo. Doesn't kill." "When you see someone in a tub full of water, filled up to the brim, what would you say about that?," said Jo. " I would say that the person was doing some soul-searching?" "No. You were supposed to say, I'd think that person would be trying to kill herself."
"I'm sorry I made you worried and pissed. I won't try to kill myself again," trying to sound convincingly remorseful. "Try?" "Yeah, I'll try. Tomorrow, dinner's on me."
After that, everything went back to how it originally was. Jody forgot about the freak incident, me attempting to drown myself. Truth is, everything was not okay. Jody has the perfect job, perfect paycheck, perfect boyfriend, perfect friends. I was just another new, screwed up social worker, trying to save adults, children and teenagers alike from themselves, on day at a time. But the sad truth was, I couldn't. It was a losing battle. Somethings were just beyond my control.
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